Bartimaeus of Uruk (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
likesfootnotes) wrote2010-05-14 05:34 pm
likesfootnotes) wrote2010-05-14 05:34 pm
Entry tags:
1st summon [audio]
Saved!
[There is an unmistakable air of vindictive triumph to the voice, and a squelch that just might be a blob of essence thrusting gelatinous limbs into the air to celebrate. This disolves into the sounds of dripping, as the blob falls apart and reforms sluggishly on. Then a few sloshes as Bartimaeus takes a gander at his surroundings and the device in front of him.]
No pretentious Mr. Mandrake here? Those were the sharp hooks of a summon I felt tearing at my essence. Not that I'm here to complain! Between an untimely and undignified death by silver tureen and a summoning to his presence, I would have to take his presence, even withstanding his atrocious fashion sense, the stench of that horrible prepubescent cologne he wears, and that terrible propaganda story-telling he does.
[Some more sloshing as he makes sure the insults have not done their part to summon up the magician. Nope, no silver-tipped spear being angrily thrust in his direction. This makes him pause; the only thing that could summon him would be his master, and the distinct lack therein suggests Mr. Mandrake did not survive to see through the summoning. That must mean he is home, sweet home!]
This is oddly well-formed for being the Other Place. Someone is being a little over ambitious. There are far too many spirits that like physical things lately -- skeletons, yucky fleshy bodies, and making rooms of our home. That's not a good sense of style.
[There is an unmistakable air of vindictive triumph to the voice, and a squelch that just might be a blob of essence thrusting gelatinous limbs into the air to celebrate. This disolves into the sounds of dripping, as the blob falls apart and reforms sluggishly on. Then a few sloshes as Bartimaeus takes a gander at his surroundings and the device in front of him.]
No pretentious Mr. Mandrake here? Those were the sharp hooks of a summon I felt tearing at my essence. Not that I'm here to complain! Between an untimely and undignified death by silver tureen and a summoning to his presence, I would have to take his presence, even withstanding his atrocious fashion sense, the stench of that horrible prepubescent cologne he wears, and that terrible propaganda story-telling he does.
[Some more sloshing as he makes sure the insults have not done their part to summon up the magician. Nope, no silver-tipped spear being angrily thrust in his direction. This makes him pause; the only thing that could summon him would be his master, and the distinct lack therein suggests Mr. Mandrake did not survive to see through the summoning. That must mean he is home, sweet home!]
This is oddly well-formed for being the Other Place. Someone is being a little over ambitious. There are far too many spirits that like physical things lately -- skeletons, yucky fleshy bodies, and making rooms of our home. That's not a good sense of style.
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If not, and if this is not the Other Place -- A possibility, since my essence is still seeping. -- then it won't be very entertaining at all. In fact, it does leave certain questions unanswered.
I was distinctly summoned. You! How did you summon me without a pentacle?
[The voice has put up aires of being rather more intimidating than it is. Imagine, if you will, a rubber ducky that has been dropped an octave and a half (or three) so that the bass of it reverberates the very ground. Yes, he is trying to intimidate you, person-that-may-be-a-magician -- and he will do it through a PHONE if he must!]
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[Is she serious? That's up for debate.]
Oh, this place can be quite entertaining. Why, just several days ago we were happily ashore on a lovely desert island, complete with coconuts and palm trees, then suddenly whisked away to this ship, where it rather looks as though someone has unleashed something much worse than a Bandersnatch or a Jabberwock.
[His intimidation attempt elicits no fear from Alice!]
I say, have you need of some warm honey? Your voice sounds atrocious!
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[Traditionally, such an application of sound has reduced adult magicians to quivering and, recently, nearly startled one commoner out of her pentacle. That it doesn't work here seems to deflate the blob, right up until the mandrake reference sinks in.]
"It's" scream?
[Gurgling that is laughter? This could be happening.]
The scream of a Mandrake is nothing. Rather strangled and pathetic, as I recall it. Survival only comes into question when you think about the risks of laughing to death.
Regardless, who would want to eat that? It's all stringy, bitter, and human. Only Jabor or Cormocodran would eat them, and that last one gave the latter a critical case of indigestion. I prefer imps usually, and foliots on occasion.
[The rest of her information sounds less appealing and amusing. Whisking back and forth sounds a lot like being summoned. Ugh.]
Jabberwock, huh? I thought the old guy had stopped using that name in Victorian England. I haven't heard of Bandersnatch though. Must be an imp, though how that could be a bad thing is up in the air; death by irritation, perhaps.
What is it that's worse?
[That is a certain Djinni remembering Faquarl and the Hopkins body issue, seeing as that is very much in the forefront of his essence. Please don't tell him his old friend is there, especially as all that familiarity between them definitely bred contempt over the centuries.]
SORRY this took so long, she's so hard. /sob
[Alice would be a lot more inclined to tremble if he didn’t sound like one of her young cousins toys. Also – in sounding like a deranged duck coupled with strange, gelatinous sounding movements,
Alice is provided with quite the entertainment!]
Well, I imagine he was likely quite different than the one you know, there seems to be different incarnations of certain creatures and people in many different rabbit holes. I’m rather surprised I haven’t run into myself here, or perhaps a different version of Lady Ascot, which would be most unappealing, though a familiar face would not be entirely unwelcome.
[She thinks about this all for a moment.]
If you look out of your door, I think you will rather see what I am talking about.
that is okay, because Alice is adorable and buys patience with her mere iconry!
[Bartimaeus is a rather prideful glob of ooze, huffing himself up until he is possibly more air than slime-- which leaks, leading it to deflate all too quickly.]
Rabbit holes? I've found some familiar spirits down worse, and done my time in worse. It's hardly the optimal housing situation for anyone, but -- [Slushy shrug.] -- judge not, lest ye be summoned.
[Meet Bartimaeus, the paragon of virtue. He's judging you right now.]
A familiar face is an easy task. Describe it and you might find it wandering around.
[Be careful what you wish for, though, Alice. Bartimaeus is unlikely to make an appearance akin to your acquaintances, but djinni do get bored sometimes.]
I will acquaint myself with the area in due time. [Is that unease? More like wounded pride, for being reduced to this form. Imagine going out naked or without cosmetics: It would be ghastly!] As for familiar or not, there are plenty of faces I can live without seeing for quite some time.
*sob* thank you for your paaatience ;_; I'm just terrified I fail so I take forEVER with her tags.
Have you ever fallen down a rabbit hole, Sir Blob? [Considering the noises he makes, she makes a sound guesstimation of what his current state just might be. It is of course, only a guess – and should she find out that he is indeed not a blob, she will profusely apologize and offer her condolences to his pride at once.] I assure you, that once you have done such a thing it will quite linger with you – even if the bruises from floating timepieces do not.
[Those had mercifully faded.]
You wish to know what Lady Ascot looks like? [Surprise, but she launches into a detailed description – from the Good Lady’s prunish mouth to her sour demeanor, Alice gives him all of the juicy details.]
I think that we can at least agree upon that, there are several faces that I quite think that I am much better off without.
and yet every tag is more awesome than the last!
Twice fallen and six times ordered. They aren't that bad, if you're in the form of a rabbit when you go. Have you ever tried that? Probably not. Humans can't change forms where I am familiar. You must be a tiny one, to have fit in the first place.
[Imagination in questions or not, her attention to detail is good. Bartimaeus will give her that, and attention to hear it all. Unlike some with limited lifespans, his attention span can last quite a while. There is little reason to ever take this form, but he is certain by the end that he could create the form in greater detail than the original.]
Quite, and that puts us on similar ground, Lady Talksalot.
[The comment is wry and a far cry from his most imaginative, but it does suit her particular brand of verbosity.]
*SQUEEEE*
I have not! I imagine that it might be quite fun to be a rabbit, so long as there is the choice to be changed back, of course. I didn’t so much mind being grown as I did shrunk however – teapots aren’t the most accommodating of quarter and I find it’s quite easy to be stepped on when you’re six inches tall. Always too small, always too tall. Never the right size.
But, no. I didn’t shrink until I had landed, and only then was I able to have a little drink and slip through the door to Underland.
Talksalot? Why, that’s a new one! I suppose I could be labeled as such – though I imagine that were I not to talk as much as I do, I would be quite boring indeed.
hearts and hugs bb!
Humans are necessarily restricted. I knew one magician that thought a djinni could assist with that, but all I could do was remove his ears and stretch out his tongue for it. That's what becomes of wanting to be a frog -- I don't think he even did find a princess willing to kiss him.
Try living in a tobacco tin with rosemary. [Dry-sounded blob alert! Here's lookin' at you, Mandrake.] I'd bet you would embrace the teapot with gusto afterwards.
What else is one expected to call you but the name you earn?
blargh my html splattered all over the page
That sounds positively atrocious. I'll take my teapot, I think, so long as I'm stuffed into it with a bit more dignity than the last time.
Well, you could call me Alice, but I suppose you're right - in retrospect, I suppose that is quite the fitting name indeed.
better than certain other things that could splatter everywhere
(I know plenty, including myself, that say quite a great deal. Unfortunately, century after century it falls on deaf ears.)
Alice Talksalot it is then. I suppose it would be congenial to avoid stuffing you into a teapot, if you agree to avoid stuffing me into a tobacco tin. This is one of those rare mutual accords.
very true!
I think I quite like that name. What should I take to calling you? I hardly think 'Sir Blob' is very nice, even if it might sound fitting.
I do believe we have an agreement, sir.
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