likesfootnotes | 2nd footnote [video] a curious morning?

[Why is a raven like a writing desk? There is only one explanation: The djinni taking that form buggered it up. How else could one mistake furniture for being a bird?

Bartimaeus, in contrast, paints a fine picture of a raven as the video starts up - his beak is even the right colour! (Though he will forever maintain that his first interpretation featured such a fetching shade of blue in the beak that the species ought to evolve in emulation.)

Yes, he is currently out and about as a raven. Sized sufficiently to carry his record, which he's toted out to The Green after a quick, tight circuit to see what his feathered friends took to wing about. Though he's not so foolish as to head into the forest to discover the true details. They can summon and bind him to that task all he likes, but showing initiative to risk his essence isn't Bartimaeus's idea of a good time.]

Quite a bit of excitement over one minor Detonation, but no harm done. Just a few feathers ruffled. I don't sense or see anything on the seven planes to get worked up about.

[Then again, he also does not realise that while his shapeshifting's survived more or less intact, the rest of his abilities are diminished. Do you really want to trust a potentially blind djinni that thinks he can see?

In the meantime, Bartimaeus is unconcerned and begins to preen his feathers. After a moment, he ends the feed.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Only minor? Where's the fun in that? Here I was hoping someone just set off a vein of unstable lyrium.

Minor is as minor does. Disappointingly bleak, if you are the sort to indulge in violence.

Can't say I indulge in it but it certainly loves to follow me around like a lost puppy.

Judging by this place's record something strange and ominous will follow it soon enough.

That's a new one, even for me. Likening violence to a puppy seems like it would be the misunderstanding of the century. People welcoming it with open arms, only to have them bitten off quite abruptly.

Does the Keep have a flair for the dramatic? To be expected, with such ancient architecture. Doom, gloom, and ominous natures do tend to come standard with parapets.

Normally I just try to ignore while it begs for scraps. Then suddenly it tries to take a bite out of my leg and I have to swat it with some rolled up paper.

Oh no it's far more than just a flair. This place practically oozes with it.

You are quite a terrible pacifist, you know. Possibly the worst at it that I've ever seen.

Ah, a self-styled professional. How unoriginal. You never hear of castles with automatic confetti dispensers.

I like to think I'm quite good at it. It's everyone else that forces me to kill them.

Now that would go a long way in making this place more festive.

Ah, a man after my own essence. Fault must be pointed where it lies: In others.

(You would be amazed at how few people can accept that. Constant denials and cross-accusations - completely foundless, I must point out.)

More festive, but less a castle. Could the lord really tolerate it being a funhouse? I doubt it - castle-dwellers are notoriously traditional.

I have never agreed so much with a bird before.

Not sure about him but I certainly could. This place has a serious lack in the department of 'fun'.

Nor have you met one as rare as this one. Birds of a feather flock together, but I go against that old school of thought - it's a rather bird-brained way of being.

Ever thought about doing anything to change the place then? Fortune favours the bold and all that.

A mage that's full of himself. Yes that's definitely a rare find these days.

[Because this guy has to be a mage right?]

Tried that once, next thing I knew it was my job to do everything for everyone. Not exactly ready to hop back into that position again.

[And here he'd just started to like this guy despite the fact he must be human. Suddenly the penchant of the violence puppy to bite him becomes abundantly justified.]

Now, what did I ever do to you to deserve that?

[To others, plenty of things - but karma from there hardly impacts here, right?]

Everyone did something to deserve anything. I'm the only one who's completely innocent here.

Then what, exactly, did I do to deserve such an insult?

Are you or are you not full of yourself?

The answer is quite obvious, don't you think?

In also has little to do with my question.

Then if it's true it's no insult is it? Just a fact being stated.

But there's no truth to it. You called me a mage and that is a terrible affront, and slanderous too!

Really now? Well as long as you're no demon I don't particularly care what you are. I've had enough of those these days.

There you go again, dealing out another insult! 'Demon' is the term of the ignorant, while we prefer 'spirit' for the most part. If you must narrow it down, then call me a djinni.

Haven't had much good luck with them either. The only spirit I know is possessing my friend and is a pretty big dick about it.

Possessing? What an utterly classless spirit. Ugh. Who would want to possess a human?

I know, we are a insipid bunch. Maybe you should talk to him and convince him to do better things with his time.

You have all the sense of a small brain, but your heart is in the right place. Is this obviously deranged spirit anywhere in the Keep?

One out of two isn't bad. That he is, and he's currently sitting inside a mage wearing a coat with more feathers than you have.

[Who knows, maybe this might actually end up helping Anders.]

[Audio]

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2nd footnote [video] a curious morning?

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